i was surprised to find i had two Bosche lives on the go last time, first half of the miserable bloody 20th Century. i know about one, the other is largely veiled, at present; i gather they were the same age. The one i know about was so weird and singular (even by Elberry standards) that i shudder to imagine the lunacy of the other, though at least he wasn’t Hitler.

i’ve only met & known of one “soul” in two separate but simultaneously living bodies/selves – a girl with a pretty nose, who i met in 2002; she was the same soul as a Speech & Language Therapist (SLT) i worked alongside in my hospital job in Manchester from 2007 to 2009 (i was a secretary). They were the same age, build, colouration, same eyes (even the Viking noticed, when by chance they met), very similar life histories, tastes, interests, strange little incidents, though the nose girl struck me as more physically robust & sexual than the SLT. Both had bad dreams – nose girl dreamt of being murdered, the SLT of demons, and also the occasional murder. She had been a whore in her last life, in America between the wars, and was murdered by her pimps. Both nose girl and the Therapist were drawn to, and afraid of, violent, dark energies, in men; they both liked me, to some extent.

i blessed a Mjollnir pendant for the SLT, to help with her dreams, a month before i left the hospital job. She was by then an atheist so i offered it somewhat tentatively, just knowing the appalling fears she was subject to when her (tempestuous but i think decent) husband was away on conferences etc., the horrible nightmares, the ancestral terror. She was pleasingly delighted, i think seeing past the unusual nature of the offer, to the spirit in which it was meant. It worked for another girl, so i hope it works for her.

At first, i merely suspected nose girl and the SLT were one – there are also very close parallels between entirely separate souls, something like a family resemblance perhaps – so it’s as well to hold fire; i’ve found physical resemblance is the strongest continuity between incarnations of the same soul – somehow more solid than the mere personality. i speculate promiscuously, but try not to draw conclusions too easily.

Then, i was talking to the SLT in my office – it was quiet, just us; aside from the slight heightening of attention i felt with her, i was in my usual bored and oppressed office mood. Without trumpets or alarms, the SLT changed into nose girl – for about 4 seconds – then changed back again. She was about five feet away, i think i had my specs on, and the office was well lit. It was just long enough to be sure it wasn’t my imagination. i felt no alarm or excitement; on a film, there would have been dramatic sound effects, i suppose – here, it was matter-of-fact, unremarkable. It only really hit me later, how remarkable and strange it was – at the time, i just thought, “hey, it’s nose girl, i was right”.

i’ve had some odd experiences but i think that’s the only one where physical reality transformed itself, in a way i can only scientifically explain by saying i must be insane. Perhaps i am, who knows. However, i take heart that just as i had (at least) two lives on the go last time, so there could be more Elberrys out there, hopefully not millions of the poor beasts. It means that if i fail here, in K___, if this truly is the end of the road for me, another Elberry can fulfill my fate, take up the task i failed. This is a consolation to me; i am so distant from my own life, that, more than death, i feared to fail the two things i felt i was born to do.

It’s all very simultaneous.

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