The class went well, i think. It required almost no preparation; all i had to do was present the situations, e.g. Student A is selling his car and Student B is buying it, then sit back and chortle appreciatively, and later correct mistakes. Some gems: two pairs were negotiating about the length of their lunch hour, one man in particular refusing to give in; his woman antagonist exclaimed, exasperated: “you are German! you concede nothing!” He just shrugged while i looked on approvingly. In fact, he had offered many concessions but would not yield on the essential point – which is how one should be in all matters. Another pair smoothed a business deal by offering to bribe their opposites with “a Christmas gift – two laptops in the boot of my car”.

However, i wouldn´t be surprised if tomorrow, which is i believe the last day of term, i am “fired”, inasmuch as one can fire a freelancer. Although i did many seditious things at my last employer, and was therefore unsurprised to be sacked, i was a little miffed to have received no warning – it has made me perhaps overtly paranoid, and attentive to the slightest shifts in the demeanour of my teflboss. A part of me wants to hang on to my only source of income (begging excepted), and to therefore polish apples for my teflboss; another part thinks it would be better to die than suck up to anyone, so i swing between an anxious attentiveness, and a studied and stony indifference – which probably makes me seem schizoid and with good potential for a Christmas killing spree.

A strange result of being computerless at home – i find it hard to really focus to write anything serious on a computer; but at home, by hand, i can write things i think are good, at last, while listening to my absent landlady´s Katrin Haag & Thomas Wahl CD, eating white chocolate, and occasionally talking to Moloch and Baal, her little zebrafinchen.

The latter pair have grown accustomed to my habits and greet my morning routine (wandering about muttering and drinking green tea) with cheerful chirpings and energetic hoppings about. i shall miss our little conversations, which go along these lines:

Elberry: Moin moin. How are you? Still here, i see. Damn i need some tea. Should i have breakfast or just go in to teach hungry? Hungry and lean and merciless and cruel, that´s good TEFLing.

Moloch and Baal: Cheep cheep cheep.

Elberry: Yeah yeah yeah.

i enjoy these meaningful talks, but i don´t think i could do with caged things – i would be too tempted to let them out to see if they prefer freedom (even if only the freedom to freeze to death or be killed by cats or other birds). Ideally i would have a dobermann, perhaps even several, a pack of dobermanns, and they would assist me in my TEFLing. i would found my own school, and fabulate “the dobermann method” and become rich and insane and fat, and finally die from eating too much pie, leaving a hideous, bloated corpse.

Advertisements