i have nothing to say, except that i feel eerie and Christmassy and am yet again giving serious thought to growing a Moses beard in which to stash wild locusts and honey and small children.

Back when i did Tai Chi, my tutor told me that regular practice causes the tendons and ligaments to totally regrow, strange though this sound. It makes a kind of sense, since i gather the Tai Chi killer uses the tendons & ligaments to generate and deliver force, rather than muscles. i think being computerless for over three months has likewise brought about peculiar & interesting changes in my brain, as if the parts to do with writing have had to regrow, so a screen and keyboard, especially in an internet cafe, prompt stupefaction and a strong desire for total reticence; whereas, with a pen and notebook, in solitude, my ideas (such as they are) come quickly and strangely – and they are strange to me now, i write, and just as i am sometimes surprised by my handwriting, so my own thoughts surprise me, they seem forward of my intellect, beyond what i know, or can easily understand. Whether anyone else would enjoy or understand them, i know not, and prefer not to know; it is enough to think them, to write them.

And now my brain is once more paralysed by the keyboard, the screen, the familiar hubhub about me.

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