Lunch break at school now, for another 10 minutes. i just bumped into the sexy French teacher and said brightly “you must be the French teacher – i thought i heard French wafting down the corridors”. She said brightly back “sorry, I don´t speak English.”

Nothing else for it, i thought, but to plunge drastically into my schoolboy French. i told her, “in Angleterre, a l’école, je suis un etudiant de Francais pour huit ans, mais je ne peut parler Francais”. She laughed and said “me too – I study English at school but I cannot speak it.”

“L’école – merde” i pronounced with finality, she laughed in agreement, and i went off for yet another coffee. Yesterday i was finally paid so today i’m going to buy some dandy shoes and perchance some dandy sherry too. Whoah!