1. A wise man once said “your future dream has sure been seen through”. The song came out when i was a wee little chubby-cheeked babby, already dreaming grand dreams of the coming Race War in my cradle. i never understood how foreigners could admire England in its present form – the countryside largely gone, the economy bifurcated into managerial spiv positions and McJobs, the people grown feckless and violent, accustomed to unemployment as a way of life, and millions of Muslims swarming over hill & dale raping white girls while the police smile and tut about diversity.

2. i wondered if it was just because i’m half-Indian and speak posh, and am a fascist, so don’t fit in anywhere, but i met even white Leftists who said there was something menacing about every English town on a Friday night, something depressing and lost about England in general. i always felt it was naff & shite to be English, at least in the miserable late 20th Century; and the only people who seemed proud of their country were either old or hooligans, or old hooligans even. Contrast with Germany where, at least in Kassel and Munich, people seem generally quite happy to be German or Bavarian, and in the latter case are often unabashedly proud of their land and heritage.

There’s almost no street crime in Bavaria, and what there is seems to do with immigrants (Turks, Russians, English teachers etc.) In England i actually preferred Muslim to chav areas, because there seemed some kind of order, albeit un-European, in the former; in the latter, you might as well be in Mordor among the orcpits, eating rotten hobbitflesh and smearing yourself with troll semen.

3. Aged now 41 i feel vaguely aware of my impending senility & death, and nodded sadly as i read Flann O’Brien’s The Hard Life:

– Well, may the sweet Almighty God look down on us with compassion! Do you realize that at your age Mose Art had written four symphonies and any God’s amount of lovely songs? Pagan Neeny had given a recital on the fiddle before the King of Prussia and John the Baptist was stranded in the desert with damn the thing to eat only locusts and wild honey. Have you no shame man?

– Well, I’m young yet.

– Is that a fact now? You are like the rest of them, you are counting from the wrong end.

i’ve thus began writing two new works: the first is a horror comedy, the latter a series of thoughts & observations i’ve titled Racist Remarks, since at present it’s mostly about race. There are also some thoughts about the occult, and i think if there is to be any unifying thread it will be merely the time of its generation; that is, fairly short passages that are on my mind and which i either don’t want to blog, or can’t. If it gets up to about 30 – 40 thousand words i may self-publish it, under some innocuous title; i thought about posting the remarks on my Patreon page but there’s something to be said for working on something over a few months, on a Cold War-era typewriter in my case, and then publishing it as a complete work.

i anticipate rave reviews.

4. i came upon this meme upon my travels:

It’s a good point, as i dare say many Irish Catholics supported the IRA, as many Muslims do the Jihaddists. My thoughts:

i) This is precisely why it is imprudent to have people of differing group-identity living in the same area (and hence, why empire tends to lead to long-term problems). Whenever people with different ethnicity, religion, or politics live in the same area they will eventually come to blows. Leaving aside the hordes of Islam already entrenched on welfare in multicultural hellholes like Bradford & Birmingham, to wilfully introduce even more Muslims to Europe is to intensify the likelihood of terrorism and race war.

ii) The IRA (and offshoots) habitually advised the police of bombs, with usually just enough time to clear the area, so the only damage was to property. Muslims wish to kill as many non-Muslims as possible.

iii) The IRA had a specific and realisable political goal. They mostly targeted military & police, and destroyed property. Their goal was to pressure the British Government for a specific end. i think many people could sympathise with the goal, just not the means.

Muslims want to destroy Western civilisation & culture, and to either murder every single non-Muslim or to force us to convert to their religion in its most extreme form.

iv) The Irish are genetically similar to the English, Muslims are not. Thus, the grandchildren of boyos could be almost indistinguishable from the English in IQ, appearance, broad character tendencies; but millenia of inbreeding in a torrid climate mean Muslims, to the umpteenth generation, will…well, be different.

v) The IRA & their sympathisers had much the same culture as the English. Thus, they did not by their very existence work to destroy English culture. The Irish have been part of British culture (in literature, in the military, in the labour force) for centuries. Muslims are a late arrival and are over-represented in crime and umemployment statistics.

i leave it to the reader to dwell on the significant contributions of our Muslim friends to English civilisation and culture.

5. Having said all that, it would be interesting to consider Sharia England – there would of course be mass rapes, mass murders, and the destruction of all that could remind of Christianity. In the end the entire country would resemble Bradford, of course, and then Mogadishu. But perhaps in a few centuries, after plague and warfare have destroyed most of the population, there would be something English about – no actually, forget it, it’s doomed.

1. i was reading Paradise Lost over lunch, Book 3, and was once more astounded by the petulant, rambling schoolmaster persona of Milton’s God, especially in contrast to Satan. So Shelley:

Nothing can exceed the energy and magnificence of the character of Satan as expressed in Paradise Lost. It is a mistake to suppose that he could ever have been intended for the popular personification of evil. Implacable hate, patient cunning, and a sleepless refinement of device to inflict the extremest anguish on an enemy, these things are evil; and, although venial in a slave, are not to be forgiven in a tyrant; although redeemed by much that ennobles his defeat in one subdued, are marked by all that dishonors his conquest in the victor. Milton’s Devil as a moral being is as far superior to his God, as one who perseveres in some purpose which he has conceived to be excellent in spite of adversity and torture is to one who in the cold security of undoubted triumph inflicts the most horrible revenge upon his enemy, not from any mistaken notion of inducing him to repent of a perseverance in enmity, but with the alleged design of exasperating him to deserve new torments. 

A curious thing – literary Satans have far more reach than literary Gods. One aspect of my projected & doomed Satan PhD was to have been the means by which Satan implies God – if one takes Satan as the symmetrical opposite of the Almighty (so Dante), then one could judge much of a culture’s conception of God by looking at its Devils.

2. Men may and usually do deny the gods and the spirit. But they rarely deny evil. Even the most rabidly materialist post-modern Leftists retain the category “evil” – they call it Nazi, Hitler, fascist, nationalist, white, male, heterosexual, but essentially it’s the old “evil” reheated with a sprinkling of Hitler. In our fallen wreck of a world, evil is, as Schopenhauer noted of Dante, rather more in evidence; and so it is not surprising that the spiritual category “evil” (that something is ontologically wrong, irrespective of societal verdict) retains its hold even where most people today have absolutely no concept of spiritual “good”.

3. Evil exists in antagonistic relation to good. It seeks to destroy good wherever it may, so as Bruce Charlton noted one can take some hope in the globalists’ insistent assault on England:

[…] the past nine months have been valuable in revealing the main reason why the rest of the EU wanted Britain to remain.

It is what the Eurocrats call ‘the free movement of people’ but which in practice means that the UK is valued primarily as the major dumping-group for people that the rest of the EU does not want

That the EU does not want these people is clear from their behaviour towards them. 


We need to ask why it is so very important to the EU rulers that Britain specifically should get more unwanted people sent to us (passing through Europe, in preference to the rest of Europe) than anywhere else, year after year, decade after decade…

It must surely mean that the destruction of the British nation is a major priority for the global elites?

Evil, i suppose by definition, cannot leave the good alone.

4. i have instituted a fine Elberry tradition of drinking gin and playing Dune 2 on a Friday evening. Dune 2 is the shizznit, exactly the kind of game i like – repetitive with enough variation to keep me at it, and since it’s from 1992 it’s naturally superior to all modern games. i’m playing as House Ordos now; their special weapon is the so-called Deviator, which fires rockets & subverts enemy units, temporarily changing their allegiance to House Ordos. i find them highly useful both in defence and offence – you can subvert a heavy unit, e.g. the massive Harkonnen Devastator, and then turn it on its erstwhile comrades, or command it to self-destruct next to its own base. As i was drunkedly playing last Friday, it occurred to me that this is one of the principle initial methods of evil – to mimic the good (the Left’s talk of love and humanity and justice) in order to take over the centres of power, and then turn them to the service of hatred, division, and insanity.

It is an initial method because after a while they can drop the mask and say, openly, “we want to kill all white people“. It is, in a sense, admirably precise – the Left do not merely acquire a useful weapon, e.g. by turning the police into “paramilitary social workers” in Peter Hitchens’ phrase; they simultaneously weaken their adversary.

If you want to locate evil as a social/political formation, look to what was once good, or at least vaguely in the service thereof, and there they are, squatting like toads. Don’t think of evil as some horned beast sitting in a dark cave in the middle of nowhere, plotting; evil is precisely where good once flourished, where peace, order, knowledge, wisdom were once; and thus it will always be. And the more evil infiltrates and corrupts the institutions of our culture & civilisation, the more the agents of evil trumpet forth the virtues they have in fact destroyed: come to our university and get a first class degree! we have a proud history of education! the police are here to protect you! our schools are the best in the world! the NHS is a classic British institution! – and so on.

5. However, evil also provokes good. The response can be symmetrical, as with the glorious Alt-Knight Stickman, but it is characteristic of the good to respond at asymmetrical depth. The globalists’ plan to annihilate European culture by inviting seemingly every able-bodied Muslim male into Europe to rape and kill and live off welfare, has by its very ghastliness provoked a shift in European consciousness.

On the sociological level, nationalism. Threaten a thing too obviously, and it tends to be re-evaluated and potentially treasured. But also there seems a metaphysical shift, which i’ve felt in myself from around the end of 2015; and i’ve noticed, in my life, the lives of some i know, and even in “world events”, magical occurrences. In my life, i now undergo daily synchronicities, e.g. writing this post referencing Varg’s time in Iraq, having no idea which video it was, and then finding he’d just made a video expanding on precisely this topic. Such synchronicities, in my experience, are akin to the deja vu glitch of the Matrix – a reordering of our visible realm; uncounted minute adjustments.

6. i feel increasingly sure that Donald Trump is part of this – more as a catalyst, a rogue force smashing through an evil structure than as a good or enlightened person; my own theory, as i wrote earlier, is that he sees himself as American, and his own sense of self is so vivid and massive that he feels personally slighted that Americans seem much fallen from the prosperity & John Wayniness of their golden years. But i think he was, in a sense, chosen for this; he has the right kind of obtuse, indomitable energy, an odd naivety and childishness, and seems, in his human failings, human and without the taint of evil so grossly evident in Hillary Rodham Clinton.

Both good and evil evince levels of engagement and manifestation. i would disagree with those who think every crooked politician, every globalist, is some kind of fully-paid-up Satanist who wants to destroy man’s connection to the gods (which would incidentally also destroy human civilisation, and more importantly all human cultures).

At the lowest level, there are those who simply loathe Western civilisation – the average Leftist, who would like to live in Venezuela, at least until she does: these people are spiritually off-balance, and probably have some kind of mental problem, but then most people seem nuts to me, whether on the Right or Left. Above this, there are the globalists who want to destroy nations, and subjugate Europeans to the Sand Peoples – i presume their motive is mostly financial, and political: deals with the Saudis et al., and the will to rule over a vast, broken empire bereft of tradition and sovereignty. The ideal of the EU is the Soviet Union – the lesser kingdoms kneeling before the might of a small circle of unaccountable, and usually unremarkable bureaucrats.

And above this, there are people like the Vulture. At that level, i suppose very few are fully or even partly initiated. They seem promised a kind of immortality by their inhabiting demons – and indeed, they often live a very long life, and are hailed as philanthropists. Very few enter this circle because very few human beings are naturally malign enough to take it. Even those of the elite into paedophilia and all kinds of ghastliness may recoil somewhat from that final dark.

Their ultimate goal is to sever all connection between man and the gods, which would not create a planet of happy smiling Richard Dawkins materialists festooned with Apple products, but rather the Planet of the Ultrachavs – chavs so far developed in scorbutic bestiality as to make even the vilest of our chavs blush for shame and say, “egh yer wha’, fockin hell that’s fockin focked, innit, knowharrimean?”

A Mark Zuckerberg would probably faint at the truth, so his kind are instead told they need to destroy nationalism, race, the family, all traditional European cultures, all religion save Islam, to create a harmonious world where everyone is mixed race and everyone is happy and is on Facebook. Although holding hands with the old evil that has always attempted the destruction of our world, people like Zuckerberg are merely stupid and wicked.

7. Most of those on the Left aren’t evil, i suppose; they are merely useful tools for evil in its various hierarchies of purpose. Thus a German friend of mine, let’s call her Rosemarie: has 3 children, one grandchild, a good job in a big German engineering company; her long-term partner is CEO of another company, they live in a large, soulless house in a nice suburb of Munich, with three Porsches and a BMW; she has a revolting pug called George Clooney, a wheezing ratlike abomination which tends to nervously vomit and shiver with fright; she coos and coddles this beast; she likes modern U2 and Coldplay and the most bland, over-produced music; she only reads Romance novels with a happy ending; she says the spoken German of Franz-Josef Strauss is “scary” and sounds like Hitler; she likes Gregor Gysi:

she goes “ooohhh!!!” over babies and kittens and puppies; when the Merkel invited the entire 3rd World to live off German welfare, Rosemarie immediately posted “Refugees Welcome!!!” on her Facebook page, but when i asked if one of my dandy friends could crash in her guest room for a few nights (he was sleeping in his car) she said no, strangers aren’t allowed in her house; after the Cologne sex attacks she asked where she can buy pepper spray and said she was now scared to work in the evening, in case someone attacked her in the car park; she never takes public transport because “there are too many dirty people there”; she has the typical materialist attitude that any recognition of death or suffering is morbid; while her life hasn’t been entirely easy, she’s never had to worry about money, and has high status in her social circles. She loves Mark Zuckerberg and forced me to read his “open letter” to his baby daughter, a nauseating piece of progressive gibberish full of the usual platitudes, pretty much what one would expect from a billionaire who attacks Trump for seeking to enforce America’s immigration laws, and then builds a giant wall around his Hawaii mansion.

People like Rosemarie are the mass infantry of the evil in our world – paint something pink and slap a happy smile on it, and they’ll enthusiastically support it, and call you a Nazi if you have your doubts. But they too will wake up.




1. Spring is here, so i’m spending what free time i have on my balcony, reading. When my Albanian neighbours come onto their balcony to scream & bellow in their heathen tongue, i put my headphones on and listen to John Coltrane at high volume. i was reading Von Moltke’s letters to his wife over the weekend, and came across this, written in Berlin on 29th October 1939:

Mein Armer, die Zeiten sind schlecht und es ist keine Aussicht darauf, daß sie besser werden. Mit dem Kopf kann ich keinen Grund finden, warum sich irgendetwas bessern sollte in vielen Jahren. Und leider kann ich reichlich Gründe finden, warum die Zeiten noch wesentlich schlechter werden. 

My poor dear, these are dark times and seem likely to remain so. I can’t think of any reason to suppose things should get better in the future. It seems alas likely that our times will grow darker yet.

(my loose translation)

Here’s Von Moltke at the Volksgericht:

2. The German Resistance to the Nazis was an odd hotchpotch of Commies, socialists, genuine Jew-hating fascists who wanted a stop to a doomed war, and old school conservatives like Von Moltke – the latter generally very Christian, Von Moltke i believe Protestant, Von Stauffenberg very much a Catholic badass:


Even those of a socialist leaning, like Adam von Trott zu Solz, would have been appalled at the hordes of military-age migrant Sand Peoples swarming into Europe to rape with impunity while today’s Left grin about “diversity” and talk openly, with glee, of a white-free Germany – Weißrein or Weißfrei, i suppose.

It is said, that when Von Stauffenberg was lined up to be shot in a Bendlerstraße courtyard, his last words were: “Es lebe unser heiliges Deutschland!” (long live our sacred Germany); other reports have it: “Es lebe das geheime Deutschland!” (long live the secret Germany).

3. One can see the human being as a psycho-physical complex – we are mostly aware of the interplay between mind & body, how thoughts & emotions interact with each other, and with the body, and vice versa; but the mind is subject to the influence of a swirling mass of rarefied & occult forces, which range from non-physical intelligences (e.g. the spirits of dead people) through to simple & usually temporary constructs, vast collective shapes (e.g. nations, religions), and gods.

The “vast collective shapes” seem to develop naturally when societies are large enough. Looking at the phenomenon of Islam in its first centuries, or the Mongol Horde that saved Europe from Islam, or Christian fervour, i think it would be unwise not to acknowledge there are forces capable of more or less spontaneously arising in a few charismatic individuals, and spreading to millions.

The Left speak much the same language of collectivist zeal as 7th C Muslims – convert or die! – in a milder form at present, but as one sees from the Leftist violence that disrupted most Trump rallies, they are fond of the tactics of which they accuse their adversaries.

4. Looking at the Left, i note a great many who would have become 17th Century Ranters, witchburners, shrieking Medieval hystericals like the frightful Margery Kempe: among the Leftists i know there are at least two with the Borderline Personality Disorder, a Narcissist, two manic-depressives, and a surprising number of women who seem to have been sexually abused in their childhood.

Now i’m not one to cast stones at Insanity Glasshouses, but by contrast i feel suddenly rather balanced and down-to-earth. My non-idyllic childhood holds almost no interest for me, and i think my trajectory has been towards normality (this Elberry life is the first i know of where most people i meet think i’m nice – odd, given how many overlaps there are between this life and my alarming others).

5. The Left has become a new mould into which the vast collective forces are pouring, and it seems there are deeper patterns to such things, for in many ways Leftism seems like a perverted Christianity:

5.1 Original Sin – if you’re born white or male you are racist scum, even if you’re not. And not being racist is a form of racism now. All you can do is give all your money to the Church (the Left) and grovel for forgiveness, but no amount of groveling will ever suffice, because of your Original Sin.

5.2 Peace & love & happiness for all – but by reducing everyone to the same level, the lowest level (“socialism”), oh, except for blacks and Muslims and gays and transgenders, and paedophiles – they should be more equal than everyone else.

5.3 Confession – you must admit to your privilege, as publicly as possible.

5.4 Crusades – destroy anyone who disagrees with you.

5.5 Satan – the Devil exists and is at work.

6. Sacred and/or secret Germany: the nation exists as an idea; a force existing outside of our physical reality. It continues to influence those who live in this terrain; it is, in a sense, our terroir and particular sun, an accustomed angle of planetary light.

The nation has an instinctive life to it, a sense of what fits & what does not; and perhaps the gods are as Forestals to the old woods, embodied guardians of a broader, unconscious life.

7. Bavaria is in some way protected from the obliteration wreaked upon most of Western Europe; i think it has some kind of warding spirit about it, embodied in the language and, amusingly enough, in little things like the Tracht, the semi-traditional/semi-invented costume of Lederhosen & Dirndl – the customs & traditions act as an anchor for the warding influence, which is why every cultural overlord will aim to destroy or compromise:

i) The genetic base of the population;

ii) The language;

iii) The traditions and customs.

It may be relevant that the Welsh of all people voted mostly against the EU, and they keep their language alive as the Irish & Scots do not (and modern UK English has become a hideous chavsprache, under the shadow of American).

8. There were many objections to the EU; for me it was always just a bad smell, a reek even: the EU was an attempt to obliterate the nation-forms, and those who see it as nothing but a legal entity lack a sense of the metaphysical framework of our social consciousness – and so either wouldn’t notice how it eroded tradition, custom, sovereignty; or wouldn’t care; or would positively welcome such destruction.

9. Germany is, in a sense, damned. The Germans are natural Besserwissers, know-it-alls who think their way is best and everyone should be like them. Many of my students have angrily snapped at me: “you Engländers are thinking you are special and you hating Europa!” as if wanting to preserve national sovereignty is a hate crime – typical behaviour from such folk.

The German nation idea is naturally domineering and imperialistic – very like the Ancient Romans and probably the Victorian & Edwardian English. The EU was an attempt to impose German hegemony on the world, starting with the old foes: France, England, the Mediterranean, and Eastern Europe; but in the process, it was necessary to destroy German culture, to exterminate the white population and impose Islam on Germany. That is typically German – clever, ruthless, brutal, and yet ultimately suicidal.

i have occasionally wondered that the Merkel and others are fully in bed with the globalists, hate their own people, and yet everything they do seems designed to push the electorate into the arms of the anti-globalists. i don’t think they are playing a long game; i think they are in a sense deeply stupid and deluded: they believe they can indefinitely cow entire nations with censorship and the police state, and swing elections with propaganda. Well, it worked for the USSR – but only up to a point; and bear in mind Russia in 1917 was a nation accustomed to rulers and despots, with little free speech – even compared to the UK, where you can expect a visit from the constabulary for making a joke. And we saw, with the US elections, just how wrong their polling can be.

Many people say we are in Late Roman Empire phase, and the Hun are about to cross the frozen Rhine the Muslims are going to cross the Mediterranean en masse. In a sense this is so.

i see no hope in a political sense – elections etc. are all very well but if about half the electorate actively hate their own country and their race and culture (as seems the case, judging from the Hillary/EU supporters), combined with the entire 3rd World swarming into Europe, waving scimitars and screaming while the champagne socialists retreat into the gated communities/100% white rural villages and utter platitudes about diversity, it all looks pretty bleak.

And yet, there is hope. We are not merely repeating the Weimar Republic. There is a metaphysical transformation underway. It is beginning to manifest in certain individuals, who are all pointing in a similar direction from their own unique standpoints; i could name Bruce Charlton, David Warren, Tarl Warwick, Varg Vikernes.

There are materialist liberal democrats who think we can just turn the clock back to the mid-90s, but this is mistaken. The old order, being utterly materialistic, could not long continue – the inevitable energies of spirit would have destroyed it, one way or the other. Only through spirit, can the material world exist; and one might take comfort from this, that for all the malign force at work in the established order of international finance and socialism, there is an opposing force – were there not, this whole planet would have destroyed itself long ago.






i’m experimenting with memes, posting them on my Elberried blog. So far it’s about twice a week, not sure if it will increase or decrease in frequency but they’re extremely easy to make and fun, and so it will doubtless continue.

i finally saw Rogue One, and was of course disappointed, as i am by everything in the modern world. However, it was passable entertainment and i can’t sleep, so here are my immediate reactions.

1. It has Mads Mikkelsen, which is obviously a good thing. It also, in the first 5 minutes, has the line: “You’re a hard man to find.” Presumably, the script will also feature: “drop the gun”, “let the girl go”, “we’ve got company” and “I have a bad feeling about this.”

2. Mikkelsen’s daughter grows up to be a Feminist called Jayna Oso. Inevitably, she is amazing at everything and can take down half a dozen Stormtroopers while the Rebel men stand there looking amazed, because they are stupid and useless and women kick ass and are like totally awesome.

3. Only fully-rounded and worthwhile character is a robot who has Tourette’s and seems to be modelled on Withnail.

4. Feminist runs around being petulant. She berates a real Rebel: “you might as well be a Stormtrooper!” – next she will call him a Nazi and a fascist and then put on a vagina hat and cry because Vader is President and her father is Hannibal Lector.

5. Some gooks appear. One is blind, another carries a huge-ass gun.

6. Forrest Whittaker appears, inexplicably.

7. i have no idea what is going on.

8. The Feminist is really getting on my nerves. She needs a good slap.

9. Darth Vader appears. His voice is highly unsatisfying. Also he doesn’t look as daunting as in the original trilogy.

10. Some good X-Wing pilots with 1940 RAF ‘staches. The battle scenes are all very well done, and the air combat has the “Spitfire vs Messerschmidt” magic of yore.

11. People are running around and saying things like “rebellions are built on hope” and everyone nods like that makes sense and is a sound basis for tactical operations. They should all die.

12. Peter Cushing appears. He looks kind of weird, like Hillary Clinton. Isn’t he dead? What year is it? Did i imagine the original Star Wars films, or did they really happen?

13. People shooting at other people. i’m only vaguely aware that the good guys are trying to get into a bad guy base to do something but i don’t know what. Am i supposed to know?

14. Soundtrack is like Peter Cushing’s face.

15. Vader slaughters a dozen Rebels with the Force and his glowing red phallus. Vader is Oh Dae-Su armed with a lightsaber instead of hammer, slaying his way down a corridor of scum – they should have just repeated this scene two hundred times, spliced in a few 1940s RAF ‘staches, kept the two gooks (who were rather good), had an enigmatic 2-seconds of Forrest Whittaker using his Frank Booth mask

and cut the rest of the film, i would have happily watched this for two hours, cheering “crush those Rebel scum, Lord Vader! For fascism! Hoorah! Hoorah! Hoorah!”

15. The plucky heroes succeed in whatever they were trying to do.

16. Everyone dies.

17. Carrie Fisher appears. Isn’t she dead? Maybe i’m dead and we are in the Congress with Robin Wright:


1. There has indeed been an awakening in the Force: i recently discovered how to consistently taste pipe tobacco; it sounds highly peculiar after 5 years of pipe-smoking, but for long i only tasted the baccy sporadically, the rest of the time merely savouring the warmth, texture, and nicotine. i have now discovered that by filling the old gob with smoke, holding, then exhaling through my nose, i can taste – well, most of the time, the smoke goblin having its own mercurial whims.

2. A few weeks ago i talked to a new colleague, a purple-haired young German teacher who i had often passed without a word, but the sense that we were mutually aware; this time she was wearing a sweatshirt with a so-called Satanic cross (actually a Leviathan Cross), and so i said, with my usual tact: “Are you a Satanist?” – and behold, much occult talk ensued.

She showed me her 80s denim jacket, emblazoned with what she called runes, but which were to me unknown and unrunic symbols; later, i realised they were alchemical symbols and started researching, feeling slightly abashed at my ignorance. i then decided to read more about the modern occult…

3. As ever, the frustrating sense that almost all occult works are nonsense, written by idiots and charlatans. i started reading a Franz Bardon book but gave up after 5 minutes; it seemed, more from the prose than the content, to be spurious; there was an offputting smell, reminiscent of modern academic prose; then i Googled his image:

There are men & women of real occult knowledge & capability, but all those i know in person tend to be reclusive. They naturally attract would-be disciples and stalkers, and repel them with a thorny eremitude. Invisibility is the condition and consequence of true power; the thorn and the rose.

i didn’t feel interested in wading through Bardon, because even in translation i felt he was a charlatan and poseur; of course, “theatricality & deception” have their place, for public effect, but stage magic and politics are not my cup of tea.

4. However, fruitless reading aside, my recent occult focus has naturally enough wrought changes in myself & my life – some odd synchronicities, for example earlier this week i saw three blind men on my travels, one in the morning (about 0845), another on the way home (about 1810) and yet another on the train at about 1830. The last time i saw a blind man was, i deem, months ago. There have also been repeated & odd crow/magpie sightings, birds of notorious repute. And yesterday, i told an old student that most of all i miss having a dog, and then an hour later was in McLingua and the first thing i saw, in the teacher room, was a rather dashing hound called Poldy – belonging to a gorgeous German teacher, who has been amusedly pleasant with me since i drunkedly told her (at a Xmas party): “Every time i see you, i admire your great beauty.” Poldy sniffed my knee and she said, “He likes you,” and i to her: “i smell like a dog, to dogs.”

5. It recently occurred to me, contemplating cause & effect, and the workings of fate, that the universe itself might be sentient. i had often wondered exactly how causality operates, how synchronicities across lives can mesh so exactly. Most in the West would now see the universe as essentially mechanistic (as is often the way, people see the world as akin to the last stage of technology). But when i consider how e.g. i came into contact with my eldest sister from my last life, i think there must be a kind of organic agency in the universe, arranging these rendezvous through a billion minute adjustments.

6. i’ve also been memorising poetry, after years. In my youth i memorised over a thousand lines of poetry (Eliot, Yeats, Stevens, Dante, Tennyson), and rather than rememorise these, i decided to let them decay and so memorised a new poem: Wallace Steven’s ‘The Snow Man’. At the same time, i’ve been copying, by hand, passages from Gordon Sander’s excellent The Hundred Day Winter War in a notebook for future use.

In both cases – memorising & copying – i found myself sensitized to meaning & language, thinking “why this and not this?”, e.g. why “the spruces” and not “the spruce” – because one tends to remember incorrectly, and must then attend; infelicities of prose are also more evident as one copies (especially by hand).

Thinking back 20 years (the spring is over), my mind really came alive when i started a practice of copying out passages i liked in notebooks now destroyed, and when i began to memorise poetry. The old schooling, as is often the case, served us well though we knew it not.

7. i feel rather excited by politics & this world, for the first time in, well, my life. Politics is always a sideshow, but it is a good indicator for deeper, more important changes. Since i became vaguely interested in society & whatnot, about 12 years ago, i felt alienated from this entire world, with academia corrupted & made a grotesque Leftist bureaucracy, and me seemingly unemployable in any except the dreariest of tasks.

And now, very quickly, this monstrous order is being undone – in part by our hubristic rulers, in part by rogues like Trump. Thus i felt with Dune’s Gurney Halleck, when – months after escaping the destruction of his armies, of his Duke, and, as he thinks, the Duke’s son & concubine, months of running smuggler operations in the desert in a life without loyalty or meaning – he is ambushed by the Fremen under the rule of the Duke’s son, Paul Atreides, alive after all:

‘Stilgar,’ Paul said, ‘this is Gurney Halleck of whom you’ve heard me speak. My father’s master-of-arms, one of the swordmasters who instructed me, an old friend. He can be trusted in any venture.’

‘I hear,’ Stilgar said. ‘You are his Duke.’

Paul stared at the dark visage above him, wondering at the reasons which had impelled Stilgar to say just that. His Duke. There had been a strange subtle intonation in Stilgar’s voice, as though he would rather have said something else. And that wasn’t like Stilgar, who was a leader of Fremen, a man who spoke his mind.

My Duke! Gurney thought. He looked anew at Paul. Yes, with Leto dead, the title fell on Paul’s shoulders.

The pattern of the Fremen war on Arrakis began to take on new shape in Gurney’s mind. My Duke! A place that had been dead within him began coming alive.

i had long supposed our world on an inexorable downward trajectory, but by inviting the entire 3rd World into Europe, the Merkel & her backers have merely initiated a cultural change – not into Bradfordisation as they hope, but into chaos, perhaps a race war, but in any case i feel our reality is suddenly altered, and new possibilities are upon us. Most of those with comfy secure jobs, emotionally invested in the collectivist order, are baffled and angry and will probably go mad and end up crawling about on the floor eating bugs and smearing themselves with dog poo, as they deserve. Those with a nose think Oho:

If you had told someone half a decade ago here in the United States ‘the next president is going to run on a populist platform from within the Republican Party, after constantly insulting his opponents, completely lambasting the very political process he’s taking part in’, do you think anyone would have believed you?
‘Oh and by the way, it’s going to be Donald Trump.’

Nobody would have believed you. They would have called you nuts, they would have dragged you off to the funny farm. The mere fact that they have to discuss these things bothers them.

8. It is not merely a political change; the collective imagination is changing, and not just because of the Merkelization of Europe – this change began in the metaphysical stratum; what we are seeing cannot be suppressed by the usual lying mainstream media, by accusing Trump and Nigel Farage and Le Pen of being Russian spies – because it begins in the cellarage of our culture & our imagination & thought. Already, i’ve noted more & more Germands & others, who 6 months ago said “Donald Trump is stupid and crazy” now saying he can’t be as evil as the media make him out to be. The next step is to think, If the media are deliberately smearing him, if the media are so determined to manipulate & deceive, then the media have a wicked agenda, and therefore whoever they hate is presumably one of the good guys. A comment i found on some joke page on Facebook:

me: i feel the need. the need for speed:
Lord: you can be my wingman anytime
Me: take me to bed or lose me forever
Lord: ok but i’ma kill goose real quick
me: wtf

That’s it exactly. The egg is cracking from within, the baby bird emerging, and the globalist goose is cooked.

1. My hideous Bildungsroman seems finally done, but i lack any will to self-publish it; however i’m relishing the sense that my recent purpose is complete and i could die now without regrets, or sense of failure. i’ve been making some small progress with origami:

2. Spurred by Bruce Charlton, i read L. Jagi Lamplighter’s The Unexpected Enlightenment of Rachel Griffin; it is very much a teenager’s book, and now on the second book i find myself a bit irritated by some of the emotional unreality, e.g. a magical combat with horrors, people burnt alive, and sundry deaths, and the teenage protagonists grinning and whooping and saying things like “Ace!”. i was unsure if it was just sloppy editing or if the author is sociopathic enough to envisage teenagers (or anyone) reacting to lethal violence and monsters from the deep with quips and grins.

The books are however fun, with an interesting gnostic concept – the protagonists all live in a Hogwarts-style school (called Roanoke, i guess a nod to Ursula le Guin’s Roke) and their historical/geographic reality is wholly different to ours, so there are characters from “Magical Australia” and a sinister Bavarian prince, who, alas, seems utterly unBavarian (but then Lamplighter is American); and “our” world is greatly influenced by theirs. In the first book, there are intrusions from a world beyond and enclosing both the mundane & the magical, with powers that are incomprehensible even to the Hogwarts-folk.

As is sometimes the case with Fantasy novels, this gets at something true: that there are hierarchies of existence & power, and the higher orders are typically invisible to those they influence or rule. Thus Frank Herbert:

‘There are people and things in our universe which I know only by their effects,’ Edric said, his fish mouth held in a thin line. ‘I know they have been here…there…somewhere. As water creatures stir up the currents in their passage, so the prescient stir up Time. I have seen where your husband has been; never have I seen him nor the people who truly share his aims and loyalties. This is the concealment which an adept gives to those who are his.” (Dune Messiah)

True power tends to conceal itself.

3. There are higher orders at work in our world now; they may be guessed at by “currents in their passage.” Inexplicable mass emotion, strange coincidences, prescience are signs of, as it were, a great creature moving invisibly through our depths.

Within our world, good and evil are not to be nakedly encountered. Even someone inhabited by malevolent non-human intelligences, like the Vulture, is (i guess) not wholly evil, or his earthly existence would become impossible, because the principle of evil is antithetical to the Being it infiltrates & variously corrupts: for neither do the spirits damned/Lose all their virtue.

Thus, one should not expect to see demons or angels in human guise as world leaders; the very nature of physical reality (highly condensed Being) would repel the former from prolonged earthly sojourn; and politics would prove impossible for the latter. The most one can see, i think, are human beings operating under varying influence; and the darker the influence, the more clearly unsettled & malign the individual, and her associates.

4. American politics has been of a demonic bent since George Bush Sr; and while Obama was (in my eyes) nowhere near as bad as Dubya, he was a willing part of this, as one sees in his massive expansion of the surveillance state, his (and Hillary’s) destruction of Libya, race-baiting and grinning benevolently on Black Lives Matter, not to mention racking up Dubya-style colossal debt – the latter however relatively insignificant, since money is just money.

Obama is a gifted actor; he could read a teleprompter and make it sound spontaneous and genuine, though his essential vacuity was alas clear when there were technical problems. Trump seems to relish spontaneity, and i’d rather hear him use the word “nice” for the umpteenth time than sit through Obama reciting a speech someone else wrote for him and then stutter like a retard when the teleprompter fails.

i would see Donald Trump as the entirely unexpected but only possible tool to break the malevolent spell of US politics – a really good human being would be useless; a bullheaded, arrogant & egotistic man, however, is fine. There is a kind of arrogance which perhaps acts as a spiritual shield, rendering the individual truly independent, because impervious to what he would deem trifles & indignities. i don’t think Trump could be bought exactly – because he would recoil from any sense of being owned.

The more i see of Trump, and the rabid attacks against him (stupid, crazy, evil, rich, eats steaks with ketchup, Hitler, racist, sexist, anti-Semite, homophobic, in the KKK, had sex with his daughter, a Russian spy, he wants war with Russia, a criminal who was rightly under surveillance, a lunatic who claims he was wiretapped, etc.) the more i feel he is absolutely not under the sway of the malevolence that owned the Bushes, the Clintons, and Obama. That doesn’t make him a good person; but a normal egotistic human being is, i would say, preferable to a human being in the thrall of demons.

5. If one were to see this in Fantasy terms, there are benign intelligences who see Trump as a valuable tool to break apart the carapace of evil. There is a kind of airy, light “shield” about him, of which i guess he is totally unaware, and within which his tremendous solidity of energy and purpose can operate. At first i thought it had absolutely no influence on him – the more benign intelligences are (as far as i can tell) averse to anything like possession or interference, unlike the malign. And then, a few weeks ago he made a typically off-the-cuff remark about “last night in Sweden”, cue the usual mainstream media headlines about how he’s insane and evil because nothing happened last night in Sweden; and then, a couple of days later, riots broke out in Stockholm. There is a constant level of “social unrest” in Sweden’s larger cities, with Muslims raping and assaulting more or less at will, the police and media hushing it up, but it’s hard to hush up large-scale riots.

Is Trump prescient? Is he, truly, the God Emperor????

One could probably say “look at what just happened in Sweden/Germany” every day, and be validated – in the last few days, a Yugoslav launched an axe attack in Düsseldorf, then hours later an unknown assailant attacked someone with a machete, same city, and today the police have closed a shopping centre in Essen citing “security concerns” – for those who don’t follow German news, this kind of thing was rather rare, before Angela Merkel invited the entire Third World to live off the German taxpayer.

However, the Trumpian coincidence is interesting, as i’ve found such odd moments mark changes in consciousness, somewhat akin to deja vu in the Matrix; i think there is a kind of vortex of spiritual energy around Trump, which will both excite hatred in those variously in the thrall of malevolent influence, and draw unexpected new allies and possibilities. Already, i think there are those in the Deep State who are either on Trump’s side, or wish to use him to attack their enemies. The truly demonic will most likely remain united in their animosity to Trump – or rather, to the “angelic” forces he inadvertently represents, and by which he is supported & protected; but the lesser devils will start to break ranks, to attack each other, and some who are not wholly lost will maybe help him under the table, as best they can.

In a storm, one may light a lamp with what lies to hand – an old match, a worn wick, wet with olive oil or even whisky, by god; the important thing is to have light.

i’ve been experimenting with memes – here are my first three creations:

feminist-blue-hair big-redeu-feministtumblr_om05ds3qps1w3ntumo1_540

There is much we can learn from our Muslim friends.

update: Varg just posted a video about his time in the Middle East, so i inserted the link, and here’s an embed:

1. i feel i’ve finally finished my 15-years-of-tedium Bildungsroman, The Better Maker. i’ve done 3 edits this month, and though there were still things to change in the last, and i even found two mistakes (which had passed unnoticed through a dozen or more edits), i feel it’s stabilised and become crystalline and itself. Not sure if i’ll bother self-publishing it, i might just print it out so i have a paper copy and then forget about it. While i think it’s good enough, i am under no illusions as to my worth, and so feel no need to push my writings at anyone. i’ve even enjoyed writing brief pieces for my Patreons, because of the limited audience. My ideal, i suppose, would be to write only for myself, but i am, in spite of everything, human and so require occasional interaction.

2. i’ve had bugger all work since November, but used the free time to write & edit; now i feel i must find other things to do with my time, or i’ll just drink and get fat and go to seed and then dress all in black and acquire a leather sofa on which to collapse, groaning about the Jews. There have been times where i did nothing with my free time, just drank and played computer games or watched youtube channels and grew vile & obese; after a month of writing, i’ve found myself in spirit leaner and focussed, and rather than relax i want to shift this focus elsewhere. It occurs to me that we need work and difficulty, and deadlines, external imperatives, in order to attain this mental and emotional clarity & will (c.f. Anatomy of Melancholy).

3. Varg Vikernes somewhere says that as a child he lived in the Middle East (i think his father was a diplomat or engineer) and saw the compound guards happily spend hours just lounging about doing nothing – this was their idea of Paradise, to do nothing.

Work seems somehow unnecessary for the emotional satisfaction of the sand peoples. This is, i suppose, one reason for the paucity of invention in hotter climates; and perhaps why their kind, even to the umpteenth generation, are overly represented in welfare-dependency (and crime) and do badly in school. Their ideal is to lounge around while the womenfolk labour; or even better, just collect generous government subsidies, while the Kuffar labour.

i’ve found the exceptions to be workaholics to shame even the Germans – my father, for example, though actually his whole family seem so; or my student Khan, who still wakes at 0200 to begin work in his company (which he owns) despite suffering from motor neurone disease. Curiously, although my father can barely speak English, and Khan still has a strong Punjabi accent, they both prefer Europe to their homelands, and are scathing of their folk.

4. Naudhiz is an overlooked rune. The need to work, not to perish, is essential to European soul. Perhaps it is otherwise elsewhere – i cannot say, since i have only met degenerate “European Muslims” or at least European Indians etc., who, like myself, are conflicted and must either choose a side fully (as i have; though it would be more accurate to say i was chosen by the old Northern gods) or lapse into squalor & violence & decadence.

If we assume that need is not an unfortunate feature of life before technology & socialism, but rather an essential and indeed needful component of the human psyche & human society, then we do wrong to avoid work and the strenuous and difficult:

cursed is the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life. Thorns also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee; and thou shalt eat the herb of the field; in the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground.

the scholar may note additional runological features to this text.

5. In times of peace, the warrior makes war on himself (Nietzsche). i’ve found, oddly, that i can’t take much relaxation; after a while it becomes sloth and apathy and then i feel soft & base and hate my life. Thus i will try to blog at least once every 10 days, will probably continue to post shorter pieces (“aphorisms”) on my Patreon, as i’ve found i like it, and have also determined, provided i have enough free time:

5.1 To learn enough Old Norse to be able to read the Eddas and know why the English means what it means.

5.2 To learn enough origami to make hideous occult structures to perturb the herd.

5.3 To lose yet more of my blubber, and become hard & cruel & racist.

5.4 To go back to doing daily Tai Chi and/or Chi Kung (it requires little time but a certain amount of energy, which was mostly given over to editing in February).

5.5 To write an occult horror comedy screenplay.

That is all.

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